Shabbat recently ended, the 7th light of Channuka was lit, and Rosh Chodesh (the new moon [of]) Tevet is upon us. I am happy to say that the light in the title is referring to my own life, and that the darkness will only be referenced quickly here at the beginning.
I decided to look at ynet news and found that over Shabbat 170 strikes were carried out against Chamas targets in Gaza, 22o people lost their lives and more and more rockets continue to slam southern Israel. The world apparently continues to urge Israel's "restraint" which is totally naive - I'd like to see what "the world" would do if their neighbours, no matter how tense their relationship, kept launching better and stronger missiles at them day in and day out. Maybe country terms are too big... I like to see what any individual would do if their next door neighbour kept throwing rocks through their windows saying "we liked our old neighbours better". You might tell them to stop, but eventually you'd call the police...and the police might say stop, but eventually there is going to be some repercussions on that "neighbour" for their actions against you. Pardon the vulgarity of it all, but restraint my butt!!! (And for all those of you laughing saying "that wasn't vulgar at all!!!", we live in a relative world - vulgar for one might be quite tame for another...)
Anyhoo, ultimately, with this whole situation, I say we have to fight fire with fire - but it is definitely not what you are thinking... Achmadinajad (I don't know or care the exact spelling of that name) has said that Israel's attacks are a legitimate retaliation against the palestinians, but with G-d's help, Israel is going to lose. He is right about two things: Israel's actions are a legitimate retaliation and that the winner will be determined by the hand of G-d! The Land that I am in, Israel, a land that the Torah, Bible, and Koran acknowledges was gifted by G-d to the Jewish people (yes that is right...If you get into a political argument with someone siding with the Palestinians just say "G-d gave the land to the Jews. He took it away for a bit, and now He has given it back!". They will not be able to argue it because they know it to be true. See Rashi's commentary on Bereishit 1:1). This is the reason we should be fighting for this Land! Not because it is a safe haven, not because we don't have elsewhere to live, but because the Creator of everything imaginable and way more beyond that, gave it to us! It is ours!
That sad thing is that right now it doesn't feel like that so much! Why not? If a person received a birthday present from someone their told is one of their best friends, and asks "which friend, who?" and gets no response, it will be hard to accept the present from "whomever" because you don't know who that person is! (We're not talking charity here...) The present will only be openly accepted when we know who gave it to us! I think too many Jews, both religious and secular have no clue who HaShem is! Not only that, they don't care! They are happy reading and learning religious texts and praying the words from a siddur and never ever close their eyes or look up to the sky and ask "HaShem? G-d? Are you there? Where are you? Can you hear me? Who are you? What is all this happening to me?" People constantly claim "I don't think this is what G-d wants..." when they experience some negative association with something religious, or otherwise. I only want to know how they know? I don't know what G-d wants!!!
I learn Torah, I keep mitzvot and I have no clue!!! I can only do the best with what I have, to try and build a strong relationship with HaShem! As The One who created everything, who allowed me to exist within His creation, I think that is the least I can do...try to find out who He is that has given me this gift, so I can say "Thanks Dude!!!" yeah, that's right, I just called G-d "Dude!!!" I related to many of my closest friends as "Dude". Why shouldn't G-d be among them?
This I think is a major issue in Israel today! We are fighting for a gift and we don't understand where the gift came from! As such, many people feel it is better just to give away the gift than to say "It is mine! I got it from Him! If you don't like it, tell Him that, not me!" Unfortunately, the enemies of Israel, the Palestinians and many of their supporters around the world DO know who we got the Gift from! They acknowledge that HaShem gave us the gift. They acknowledge that HaShem can take it away. They say "G-d willing we will defeat Israel" and we say "Machine gun willing we will defeat them". Until we come back and address the situation properly and say "G-d gave me this gift! It is mine! If you don't like it, take it up with G-d, but leave me alone!" we have no chance of victory. We can bomb and bomb and bomb, and they will keep doing the same. If we don't know who gave us the gift of Israel, than how is He ever going to come to our defense!? (Please note, this is not saying that the army shouldn't fight. They should just fight with the intent that G-d is fighting for them, and they are merely His vessels of manifestation in the world. The gun can shoot 1000 rounds, but it is only by the Will of HaShem that any of them will hit anything...)
It is our time to turn our hearts to Heaven and for everyone one of us, Jew or non Jew to say "G-d, I'm here! I know we haven't spoken much lately! My Bad!!! Let's catch up a bit!" This might be a start! May it be HaShem's will that All his children, Jews and non-Jews alike, start acknowledging Him for all the gifts He has given us, and start establishing some sort of relationship with Him! Amen!
Okay, that said (some "quickly here at the beginning", eh?) on to more personal matters! The reason for this whole thing is to keep those who care updated on my life!
I left off a week ago, on route for Tsfat. I went to Tzfat and went directly to Ascent, a hostel that teach Kabbalah and Chassidut, mostly as taught by ChaBaD and tied in with many of the teachings of Rav Ginsburgh, shlit"a. The best part was that they offered classes on various subjects based on the teachings of the Kabbalah and Chassidut (two official classes a day) and for each class you attend, 10 NIS were taken off of the cost for staying. Learning Torah AND saving money! What a deal! :)
Oh, and just so you know, this is the view from right outside of my room at the hostel.
Okay, so, I was there for the first couple of nights of Channuka! We lit candles and sung songs,
and they hosted Birthright groups and we got MANY soufganiot (greasy jelly doughnuts) and one of the Rabbi's invited me and another couple of the guests over to his house and they were very hospitable and it was overall a GREAT experience. I would recommend to anyone of all ages to check it out next time they are in Tsfat! Their official website is www.kabbalaonline.com. I will include this in my list on the right hand margin after I conclude this post. Anyway, I made some great friends there, some of whom I have been keeping in touch with since then! Baruch HaShem for meeting nice people wherever I have been going!
One of my days in Tzfat I went to the Mikveh of the Arizal (Rabbi Yitzchak Luria Ashkenazi, z"l) and then, instead of going right to his kever (grave site), I went to the bottom of the cemetery to the Ohel (tent/building over the grave site) of the prophet Hoshea. I really wanted to sit there and read the revelations that he brought down and the prophesies he had, but there was no TaNaKh (Torah, Nevi'im, Ketuvim - the three parts of the Jewish Bible) in the building, so I recited the tikkun klali, the general remedy, 10 chapters of Tehillim (Psalms) as revealed by Rebbe Nachman of Breslov (Psalms 16,32,41,42,59,77,90,105,137,150) that are a general rectification for any blemishes on the soul. I actually said the tikkun about six or 7 times that day as I said it again and again at every kever of a Tzaddik that I stopped at, all the way up to the Arizal. It was raining the whole time and a very powerful experience. My little tikkun klali booklet is totally water damaged!! :) Anyway, that night, after all that happened was such an over all great night. I can't put it into words. A lot of the stuff I mentioned earlier took place and I generally had a very good mood about everything going on around me, Baruch HaShem!!!
While in Tzfat I picked up an email from the Yeshiva where I will eventually be studying saying that my room is ready and to be in touch! I left Tsfat for my family in Binyamina where I had left many of my things.
En route to Binyamina, I stopped by Meron - about 10 minutes away from Tzfat to visit the kever of the Holy Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, Rashb"i, who revealed to the world the teachings of the Holy Zohar - the premise for most of what is understood today as Kabbalistic wisdom. At his kever I said the tikkun again, and in the stack and stacks of seforim (religious texts) there, I was able to find a copy of Hoshea. I found a cave on the hill (the kever is atop of mount Meron), one which I had discovered (not for the first time) during Lag Ba'omer this past spring, and in that cave I took shelter from the rain, lit Channuka candles, lit more candles for ample light (you are not supposed to used the Channuka candles for anything but to look at them) and started reading the book of Hoshea in the cave. Between chapters, I would glance up and stare at the candles glowing....
It was quite a powerful experience. Especially once I got to the end it carried special significance as my last bar-mitzvah student before I left for Israel had the haftarah (prophetic reading) from the last chapters of Hoshea!
I soon after left Meron and headed back towards Binyamina. I JUST missed my bus, and had to wait about 45 minutes to an hour until the next one showed up, but it did, I found my way back, left my hat on the bus :( oops, and was back with family!
After spending a week in Jerusalem and Tzfat, 2 of the 4 Holy cities, being in a town like Binyamina was actually quite difficult! I mean, it was great to be with family again, but rather difficult to get into a spiritual mode which came so naturally in those other places. I got in touch with the yeshiva and arranged that I would go there after spending a second night in Binyamina. While I was there my cousins with whom I was staying were blessed to become grandparents!!! It was very exciting! They were very excited! It was great to see and to be there with them. They were truly SO good to me during the time I was there. I could have asked for more or be more thankful that they were there for me to give me a place to stay.
At about 1130am the next morning, I made sure that everything I had was in order and started the shlep of 160 pounds of stuff (what was I thinking) from Binyamina to Efrat. 1 train, 2 buses (which turned into 3 - I'll get to this soon) and a whole lot of shlepping!!!
Getting to the train was fine, I figured out a decent way to lug all my stuff, putting my stuff down and sitting on the train worked well as I sat right next to the luggage rack, getting off the train was just more shlepping - thank G-d for elevators - and here is the first trouble I had. I had been to the station before last time I went to Jerusalem. I thought I remembered which way I walked...I didn't. I walked down the long hallway that crosses over half of the highway, exited and looked around thinking "now, where are those buses...?" After asking 3 or 4 or 92 people, I was finally informed they are on the other side of the highway. oops. So, I had to remind the guy that I had just left 3 minutes earlier, had to cross the same half of the hallway, tell the lady at the ticket booth that I exited the wrong side, cross through the train station, cross the other half of the highway, and finally get to the buses. Okay, so now, with two broken shoulders and aching forearms, I finally get to the buses. My bus came quickly and I loaded up and got a nice rest. The Jerusalem central bus station has some serious security. I had many bags, one of which is VERY large. Okay, 20 minutes later, I entered the bus station and had to figure out which bus I needed and it happened to be all the way on the upper level, which required 2 elevators and walking through crowds of people (with all 160 pounds of my bags). I found the place, got on the bus 20 minutes later and sat down for a ride that I have never taken before. It wouldn't have been a problem...it shouldn't have been a problem. I didn't hear the driver call "tachana achrona" - last stop, and then I realized that we were leaving Efrat and heading back to Jerusalem. I asked the driver if I had missed my stop (duh) and he explained that he had said last stop and I didn't hear him. He was nice enough about it though and let me know when the next stop was that I could cross the street and get back on the same bus. So, back out of the gush etzion block, and into the outskirts of Jerusalem, I got let off the bus, grabbed all of my 160 pounds of stuff, and started trudging, now in the rain, across the street. There was lots of traffic and I had to wait for four lights - anyone who knows Israel's traffic light system will understand this. As I approached the stop, I looked up to see my bus.....driving away! In the next hour, I watched a busy trempiada (hitchhiking spot) and 2 packed bus stops empty of people, leaving me and my HUGE bundles of stuff alone in the darkness in the rain. I smiled! I looked up, and said "HaShem! OY! What have I done to deserve this? Is it a test? Are you trying to see how I'll react to a given situation? Well, I know that You are behind all of this stuff and I know that even though it seems like a giant hassle to me, if it is from You, it MUST be good!!! Please HaShem, bring me my bus! It is getting chilly out! I have a lot of stuff and I just want to get to the yeshiva!" I went on like this for probably the next 2 minutes. I would've kept going but the third time I said "Please bring me my bus" my bus turned the corner!!! Baruch HaShem!!! :) (If your a skeptic and are thinking "the bus would've come anyway whether i had asked HaShem or not..." I don't really care if it would have! All I know is that my conversation with HaShem made the smile on my face bigger and bigger by the second! How big is your skeptical smile? ;) I sat in the front row this time and had a whole conversation with the driver who actually drove me a little out of his way to drop me directly at the gates of the yeshiva!
I called the madrich (the advisor) who had left my key with someone, aaaaaaaaannnd.....he didn't answer! I called again...still no answer. I remember him saying something about his neighbours. I looked on the doors of a bunch of the units and found one with his last name. I went to the neighbours and knocked. No answer. Once again, OY! I knocked again! Nothing. I looked up and asked HaShem to get me to my room so I could put my stuff down and relax for a bit. I noticed the door bell. I pushed the button - it buzzed really loud! The window behind me opened up and a lady, wife of one of the Rabbinical kollel guys, said "they're not home! Can I help you?" I explained that I was a new arrival and that they were supposed to have my key. She said "hold on", called them, found the details, and Baruch HaShem 7 hours after leaving Binyamina I got to my new apartment.
I have my own bedroom, living room, bathroom, and kitchen sink with a few cupboards (no stove or fridge). I couldn't be happier. I was expecting a bed, a shelf, a desk and a roommate or two. Upon letting me in Karina had invited me over to meet her husband (soon to be Rabbi) Baruch and their son Dovid! Cute kid! haha... Anyway, I went over, did a candle lighting and ate some latkes (fried potato pancakes...mmm..)
I went back to my room, unpacked, was greeted by a couple of my neighbours (who also learn at the yeshiva) and eventually went to bed. I woke up at 6:45am in time for 7am Shacharit and as I stood up, this is what I saw...:
Welcome to Yeshivat Torat-Yosef Hamivtar in the Judean Hills, Israel! :)
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